Try explaining a life bundled with episodes of this -
swallowing mud, swallowing glass, the smell of blood
on the first four knuckles.
You see, I take the parts that I remember and stitch them back together to make a creature that will do what I say or love me back. - Richard Siken
The light is no mystery,
the mystery is that there is something to keep the light
from passing through.
Welcome to my Lydia x Pete Feels, courtesy of Richard Siken. IT’S ALWAYS COURTESY OF RICHARD SIKEN.
He was not dead yet, not exactly —
Parts of him were dead already, certainly other parts were still only waiting
For something to happen, something grand, but it isn’t
always about me,
he keeps saying, though he’s talking about the only heart he knows—
He could build a city. Has a certain capacity. There’s a niche in his chest
where a heart would fit perfectly
and he thinks if he could just maneuver one into place —
Well then, game over.
There should be just one safe place in the world,
I mean this world.
People get hurt here. People fall down and stay down and I don’t like the way the song goes.
Sorry about the scene at the bottom of the stairwell
And how I ruined everything by saying it out loud.
Especially that, but I should have known.
You see, I take the parts that I remember and stitch them
to make a creature that will do what I say
or love me back.
I’m not really sure why I do it, but in this version, you are
not feeding yourself to a bad man…
Richard Siken - Litany In Which Certain Things are Crossed Out
Let me tell you a story about war:
A boy spills a glass of milk and his father picks him up by the back of the shirt and throws him
against the wall. You killed my wife and you can’t even keep a glass on the table. The wife had died of sadness,
by her own hand. The father walks out of the room and the room is almost empty.
The road outside the house lies flat on the ground. The ground surrenders.
— Richard Siken - War of the Foxes (II) [x]