"When I was about 20 years old, I met an old pastor’s wife who told me that when she was young and had her first child, she didn’t believe in striking children, although spanking kids with a switch pulled from a tree was standard punishment at the time. But one day, when her son was four or five, he did something that she felt warranted a spanking–the first in his life. She told him that he would have to go outside himself and find a switch for her to hit him with.
The boy was gone a long time. And when he came back in, he was crying. He said to her, “Mama, I couldn’t find a switch, but here’s a rock that you can throw at me.”
All of a sudden the mother understood how the situation felt from the child’s point of view: that if my mother wants to hurt me, then it makes no difference what she does it with; she might as well do it with a stone.
And the mother took the boy into her lap and they both cried. Then she laid the rock on a shelf in the kitchen to remind herself forever: never violence. And that is something I think everyone should keep in mind. Because if violence begins in the nursery one can raise children into violence.”❞
I fucking hate it when people say the woman is stupid for staying with her abuser and it’d be so easy to leave.
NO IT ISN’T.
7 years later it’s still a possibility I consider. That 70% window doesn’t really close. No matter how far you move (3,000 miles, then another 1,000), or how different your life becomes. Staying in one place sometimes feels like a slowly accumulating weight.
I guess I never really thought about it that way before.
"The greatest threat to women is men. Do you know what the greatest threat to men is? Heart attacks."
Whoa, hold up there a minute. If you’re cutting your wrists after your boyfriend broke up with you again, THAT’S STILL SELF HARM. I don’t see how it suddenly isn’t just because you don’t approve of their reasons. Any attempts at injuring yourself is self harm even if you do it once. And it’s still really bad no matter how often it happens.
Bulimia IS making yourself puke AT ALL. It’s not normal to make yourself puke EVER. Chronic Bulimia is where you do it often. Plenty of bulimics don’t puke after every meal. You only have to force yourself to puke three times a week to be diagnosed. Edit: Some bulimics do not puke at all! The only rule for diagnosis is PURGING. Purging also is done through laxatives and does not always include self-induced vomiting. To be Bulimia, though, it has to be paired with binge eating.
Insomnia IS ANY DIFFICULTIES WITH SLEEPING. "Transient insomnia lasts for less than a week. It can be caused by another disorder, by changes in the sleep environment, by the timing of sleep, severe depression, or by stress." So when you’re stressed about a test and can’t get into a deep enough state of sleep or stay asleep, that is insomnia. Chronic Insomnia isn’t not sleeping for two nights but insomnia can be.
Schizophrenia is not seeing things when you’re high, but getting high too often can cause schizophrenia.
Someone who complains about a sudden switch when they’re depressed might really have MPD. Switches are often triggered as emotional responses to certain situations. No two people’s MPD behaves the same; patients display huge differences in number of “alters”, methods of switching between them and frequency of those switches.
Depression is ANY period of deep emotional low. “Depressed mood is not necessarily a psychiatric disorder.”CLINICAL DEPRESSION is the disease that causes a person to feel depressed with no known cause, though it can be linked to events in the patients life.
When someone complains about anxiety before a test it is not actually anxiety. But if their stress manifest as, say, that worry triggering you to worry about ridiculous situations such as leaving the car door open when you never would or having forgotten to turn off the stove, it is anxiety. No matter how often it happens. Anxiety is an EMOTIONAL STATE of worrying intensely about things unlikely to happen. When it becomes a psychological problem, it’s called General Anxiety Disorder. People can be Anxious and not have a disorder at all. It’s an emotion.
Check your facts before trying to control how people label their emotions. There are some good points here, but some of these are just awful or misinformed. Like how in the world is that self injury example NOT self injury?
When you make a ‘ladies are awesome!’ post completely comprised of white cishet women it makes me sad.
Also, on the Jennifer = Paige = Darach: I’m down. I’M SO DOWN. I support her and her life choices. I support her seducing Derek to “fuck him over” because HI HE FUCKED HER OVER FIRST. If this is a thing that happens, I will so be all “MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE SLOWED YOUR ROLL, DEREK. INFORMED CONSENT, DEREK. JFC, DEREK.”
For fuck’s sake.
there’s no such thing as fate.
#when you think about everything she’s been through and every choice she makes regardless#and you still bitch about her putting a knife to someone’s throat when they’re climbing in her window#i wonder if you really watch the show at all#because let’s say it was an alpha werewolf or someone who wanted to commit real harm#[casually points out Isaac has been that person at one point]#and she was ready for them and that’s what’s fantastic#if anything you should be embracing the fact that in a world where we’re constantly given female characters ~in distress#in a world where people are STILL shamed for enjoying strong female characters because somehow that makes them bitches#she doesn’t appreciate what so and so male character has done for her? or how he feels for her?#fuck that look at all the freaking awesome things she’s done for the entire group#think about the lives she’s saved and the cases she’s solved#she doesn’t owe anyone shit#she doesn’t owe Isaac anymore apologies and she wasn’t ABUSING HIM#jfc he was LURKING OUTSIDE HER BEDROOM WINDOW#CREEPER ON EVERY LEVEL OK#but that’s not the point you get; you see it as her attacking him?#well fuck me sideways because you’re missing the whole point#Allison Argent isn’t here to look after puppies or appreciate a fucking scarf#she’s not here to fall in love with Isaac or to love Scott from afar or whatever it is you want from her romance wise#she’s here to kick ass and take names and learn about her own strength#what you should really want for Allison as a character is what every teenage girl wants which is to find out who they are#discover your strengths and weaknesses and be there for your friends and be seen as someone strong#someone empowered#don’t even with your romantic agendas for this strong badass hunter princess ok? #thanks (via halesparkles)
I think what bothers me the most - aside from the ridiculous “getting a random alpha to werewolf bite your clueless girlfriend” thing, which is so dumb I can’t even acknowledge it - is how incredibly, falsely psychologically simplistic this was. People are very, very complicated, and while certain events in our lives can have profound and direct consequences on our behavior, the notion that Derek is somehow ~explained~ by this stupid story is just disingenuous. As I said in my earlier post, we got nothing about his relationship with his family members (except for Peter, which was frankly just WEIRD, and also, AGES?), about how being a werewolf affects your physical and social development, or about KATE FUCKING ARGENT. All of those things are really important to Derek’s development as a person, and yet the implication of this episode is that the key to understanding everything about Derek is that he - I say once again! - LIKED A GIRL AND THEN WAS DUMB AND KILLED HER AND FELT REAL BAD. This would be bad writing even if we knew and understood what the girl was like; the fact that she’s a cardboard cutout of a person makes it even worse.
Which is pretty much why I refuse to accept it as reality, honestly. That, and the fact that cocky obnoxious teenage boys are just about the least compelling set of people on the earth. (See also: Jackson fucking Whittemore.) I do not give a shit about a bb Derek Hale who was a smug asshole who harassed girls. I am way more invested in a bb Derek Hale who is awkward and uncomfortable and can’t quite handle his own strange body and who is constantly in the shadow of his older sister and kind of scared of his parents even though he loves them. That’s an interesting and complex person. The Derek Hale we got tonight was a two-dimensional dick.
This episode was terrible and I am deleting from my brain.
The only thing I want to add is how Peter was all “he was a lot like Scott, actually” at the beginning, and I was excited to meet a smiling rainbow boy made of sunshine who was kind to his best friend and loved his mom and let a girl borrow his pen when he liked her and instead we got the guy who used to make me cry in high school (and honestly, I don’t care if he felt bad about it - still a douchecanoe).
Fuck you, Davis, this was just some terrible bullshit where you had to retcon the werewolf eye color (which you have ADMITTED was meaningless when the show started) to mean “killed an innocent” and instead of having Derek’s killed-an-innocent story be literally ANY of the 5-6 examples of that I can think of off the top of my head which would have advanced the plot, you picked THIS FUCKING MESS. You’re a terrible writer sometimes, Jeff, but this one was particularly galling.
PS if it turns out that this whole episode was mostly bullshit because Peter is an ~unreliable narrator~ I am going to both be really happy and also show up at your house and punch you in the ballsac.
i mean…jesus christ, the whole kate argent storyline was QUITE ENOUGH to explain derek’s PTSD and sense of worthlessness, we REALLY DIDN’T NEED a pointless bb love story showing that, once again, derek losing everything he loves. in season one, when derek tells scott that he’s a teenager and should live his life like one, it makes sense from the viewpoint of someone who feels responsible for the destruction of his family, who lost his innocence to someone he loved who was actually manipulating him both emotionally and sexually. that’s character development. derek being a shy, awkward, goofy teenage boy who is seduced by a beautiful older woman is character development. derek being a popular, douchey jock who inexplicably falls for a mousy cello player and decides to turn her into a werewolf? is not. as i said on twitter, if this were an actual fic i would’ve x’d out of it ages ago.
also, jeff davis? you need a lesson in “show don’t tell” in THE WORST WAY.
whispers~dean and sam lying to each other is a shitty plotline and it got old 6 seasons ago pass it on~